Thursday, January 16, 2014

Anxiety and a Nice Dress


Okay, I'm gonna level with you guys. This week has been incredibly stressful. I've been a walking anxiety attack since Monday.

The worst part was my night class, because the teacher is awful. He spent the evening making fun of students and telling crude stories (because you know a teacher is cool if he curses). I don't want to hear about the time you peed on your friend's sleeping bag as a joke, thank you, not to mention how unprofessional that is. He really crossed a line from unpleasant to unacceptable when he told a story about how he made a girl cry in class. He "made the mistake of asking her what's wrong. You never ask a woman what's wrong because then she'll start sobbing. Turns out she was mentally unstable and medicated lololol" Yeah even if he wasn't basically bashing my entire demographic with that line, labelling women as hysterical and laughing about mental illness is not fucking okay. I left the class sweaty and shaking and have been anxious ever since. 

This really isn't fun to talk about, and I don't like admitting my weaknesses (on my fashion blog) publicly, but the whole experience really triggered my anxiety disorder and all week the old symptoms have been coming in waves. It really hasn't been this bad since I went up for Specialization Review and learned I had GAD in the first place.

Luckily, Wednesday's class went a lot better (if it hadn't I was prepared to report his ass). It seems like the guy is annoying in general, but tolerable as long as he's not talking to you about his life or opinions... so I'm feeling better right now.



I also found out that my elective, which I thought was on advertising, is on journalism, which I have no clue about. Haha we'll see if I'm any good at on-screen interviews and opinion pieces! There are a multitude of other stressers that have been bugging me this week (and that wouldn't have effected me so badly if it weren't for my anxiety), but I'll keep them to myself in an effort to look on the positive side. I will say that my  thesis photoshoot is Saturday and I'm nervous as hell! I hope it all goes well.

I got this pretty new backpack for Christmas and I'm excited to carry it around school this semester. Unfortunately, it doesn't fit my camera. :(






Dress: Dear Creatures
Tights: Target
Cardigan, Shoes: Thrifted
Backpack: Hershel



Anyway, here's to my next post being a more positive one!! (And I wish I could get this damn pink to stay in my hiar!)

13 comments:

  1. You look so adorable and happy. :D

    ReplyDelete
  2. 1) You look adorable. That dress is cute and the white contrasts nicely with your peach/pink hair.

    2) Onto the hard stuff- I really, highly, highly encourage you to document/write down what happened. I would go to either the head of the department and/or your advisor to talk about it. At the very least, they may be able to help you transfer into a class that will be mentally healthier for you, but it might also be that this teacher has been an ongoing issue that needs addressing and evidence or complaints have been lacking. That is incredibly unprofessional!

    Even if you choose not to go now, I would consider starting to document such behavior and/or start recording class lectures.

    ReplyDelete
  3. You look amazing. This dress is perfect with the short hair.

    Onto the other stuff in here: That professor sounds like an absolute asshole. I would 100% report him. My friends have had issues with professors before and they went to the department head and filed complaints. The one situation (similar to this) was dealt with accordingly and the professor was reprimanded severely. You are not paying for people to be assholes to you. That shit is uncalled for. Speak up, lady! Even if you do it anonymously, I am certain you are not the only one offended. As for the anxiety, I am one big ol' blob of anxiety. It's really hard to be in college with anxiety issues and well, living in general is hard. I've learned to "control" it or rather "calm down" more quickly by using this technique of "eft" or "emotional freedom technique" and it's been a true lifesaver in that regard.

    Okay, I've written a book, I'm sorry! But at least you look totally amazing, right?

    ReplyDelete
  4. This definitely sounds like something your dean needs to hear about. I was in a Spanish night class where the teacher was fired half-way through the semester. (He was showing students other student's grades) I wasn't the one who reported him to administration, but I should have been. I ended up having to drop the class (fortunately before the drop date, but it was still dreadful). I think Kristian has the right idea - you might be able to transfer to a good class. Professors are supposed to be professional.

    I'm really sorry about the trouble it's caused you - anxiety is the worst. :-/

    But - your outfit is great (yay wine tights) and your backpack is super cool!

    ReplyDelete
  5. you look so adorable! it's such a pretty dress!

    Giveaway <3 SHE WALKS Blog

    ReplyDelete
  6. I think you should report your teacher. That is unacceptable in so many ways, and I'm really sorry that you had to put up with it, as well as the other stressful things going on. Many hugs <3

    ReplyDelete
  7. Jesus tapdancing Christ. I'm with everyone who says you should report him. As though mental illness didn't have enough stigma attached already!

    (Also, I have OCD, and if you ever wanna talk about, like, being a blogger with anxiety or something, you know where to find me.)

    ReplyDelete
  8. Just remember to breathe! Hopefully things calm down in time for you to enjoy your weekend and next week will only be better. :)

    And that backpack is pretty boss. But I always have the same problem - my favorite bags never seem to fit my camera. Heartbreak. But...also first world problems. Ha.

    ReplyDelete
  9. What an adorable dress! I love this.

    Tiffany Ima
    Style Honestly

    ReplyDelete
  10. i'm so sorry to hear you're having a rough go lately. i once dropped a class on the first day because the professor went on and on about a group project that would be like 50% of the grade and all kinds of useless speeches and weekly reviews and i knew my anxiety and control issues would not agree with that. granted, it's not at all like your situation but i hope you don't feel too isolated or alone— there are tons of us out there but unlike your professor i guess we try to maintain some sense of professionalism or positivity or something in life/on our blogs.

    anyway, you are great and i'm glad the second class went better <3

    ReplyDelete
  11. Gorgeous dress and I love your glasses!

    Your prof sounds horrible--I'm terribly sorry. It is hard dealing with people who set your nerves on edge--especially when they're an authority figure. I have anxiety issues myself, and I know the feeling: shaky sweaty hands, your chest feeling like it's going to burst, the inability to speak. Bleh. I hope it gets better for you! Good luck with your photoshoot!

    xox

    Kalie H.
    kalieandgimli.blogspot.com

    ReplyDelete
  12. Gorgeous dress, you look absolutely wonderful! :)

    Hayfa
    www.londonloafers.com

    ReplyDelete
  13. What a horrible teacher.. how can he even say that and just laugh? I would definitely report him. That's just not acceptable ugh.

    Your dress and bag are cute!! Stay positive :D

    ReplyDelete