Friday, February 22, 2013


TGIF, amiright? 
So the other day someone described me as "girly". I wasn't like, offended or anything, but it did get me thinking. I've definitely described myself as girly, or at least my clothes, art, and tastes. But I never really thought of my personality as girly. I think before I address that, we've got to define the term!
"Girly" is probably a pretty subjective term. I guess it refers to stereotypically female behavior, and I think anything that makes use of stereotypes is not the most proactive/feminist thing out there. But assuming we all have a similar definition of excessively feminine stuff (ie pink, unicorns, ruffles, and lace), how do we go about applying that to someone's personality? Someone who doesn't want to play kickball because she might break a nail? Someone who would rather talk about makeup than video games? Maybe someone who is sweet and delicate and pretty? I mean "girly" could really be taken in good or bad ways, but I think it's mostly used as a negative thing because its like an excuse you can use to opt out of intellectual conversation or manual labor.
So yeah, I dress super girly. I paint super girly things, and I like being a girl. But I'm not sure if I'd describe my personality as "girly"... and I think maybe there's just a problem with how we as a society have come to define the word, like it's a negative thing. I mean, here I am, shying away from being described that way.
Girly should refer to the real things that (generally speaking) separate women from mean. Like girly should mean thoughtful, intuitive, sexy, and interested in personal relationships.
Well it looks like I just got up on a soapbox or something here. I'm really trying to be more open on the blog about my life and feelings, and honestly I'm more willing to talk about controversal topics than my internal crap. I may stop if I start to annoy myself or if someone gets mad because I'm scared of confrontation haha.
But on the girly topic, this is a pretty girly outfit, huh! I was real excited about it, even if my feetsies hurt a bit by the end of the day. I for real love the skirt on this dress, it's definitely has a unique (and wonderfully twirly) place in my closet.
dress: Ruche
hat, shoes, belt: thrifted
black dress (you can see the sleeves): Everly
coat: Wet Seal
necklace: a gift from my lovely roomate!
 You guys have a good weekend!


  1. Great look! The hat and shoes pull it together in my opinion.

    Re: use of the word "girly" - I actually wrote about that back in December. Basically, my kind of feminism is about valuing femininity equal to masculinity. And that means it's not silly or degrading or anti-intellectual to be traditionally feminine.

    Check it out here, if you want:

  2. (Also, I'm curious about why you shy away from stereotypes and then claim that women are more "thoughtful", "intuitive", "sexy", and "interested in personal relationships" than men. That may be true in your experience, but isn't that what stereotypes come down to: being true in some people's experiences but not in others?)

    1. Well, I know that my feminist friends and I don't really see eye to eye on this, but I believe that there are inherent differences between men and women (other than the obvious one), from a general standpoint. I realize that on an individual level, there are plenty of men doing sterotypically feminine things and vice versa. But I think that once you let the stereotypes negatively effect your opinion of someone or keep them from pursuing equal opportunities, there lies the problem.
      And it really could be that these particular characteristics are just from my own personal experience, but I do believe that women and men's minds work differently to a certain extent.
      Thankyou for your thoughtful commentary, by the way! I'll check out your post.

    2. I do agree that there are some differences. Sexual dimorphism is a real thing throughout the animal kingdom. I do, however, think that those differences are mostly in neurological processing, and we should be careful not to extrapolate too broadly. For instance, concepts like "sexy" are big and complicated and involve many factors other than just neurology.

      I'd never claim that there were NO differences, though, in part because that really encourages transphobia. Transsexualism occurs when someone has the body of one sex but the neurological wiring of the other, and to say that distinction isn't real is tantamount to saying it's "all in their heads".

    3. Fair enough. I mean, I'm hardly an expert on any of this, haha. But you're right, it's a big, complicated, and interesting topic!

  3. YES, TGIF!! I think that is definitely an interesting thought. Girly does seem to mean something about your personality when they say it that way. But the way you dress and your personality can be far from the same!
    I love this outfit, the polka dot sleeves underneath are too cute and I love the touches of red on your hat and shoes! Plus, I really love your glasses frames too.

  4. I agree with Jessi- how you dress and your personality are not the same thing. You can wear a pink and frothy and adorable number like this and- well, as you said, does that mean your personality is pink and frothy (what would that even mean? Actually, I suppose I should be more wary of using the term at all- I know I've used the term girly to describe different bloggers styles and meant it in a positive way, but thinking on it know "girly" kind of denotes it is like a girl rather than like a woman. And I wouldn't want to imply that for anyone! Thanks for getting on "your soapbox."

    Also for showing us this adorable look. ;)