I've got a lecture on confidence coming to you this morning!
You know I really hate it when people assume that fashion is shallow. Like I'm dressing like this to impress someone with my looks. I'm not, I'm dressing for me. People are all "Oh, looks aren't important, it's what's inside that counts!" Well there aint nothin wrong with looking good, okay! I dress on the outside the way I feel on the inside.
And ya know what, looks are important. If you like the way you look, you feel great all day! Ladies, society expects us to be modest and humble but be beautiful at the same time. Think about movie heroines. They are never vain, they're sweet, snarky, the girl next door. But they look like fucking Taylor Swift! Think "You Don't Know You're Beautiful" by One Direction. Guys have a total boner for humilty (when combined with hotness of course) and we're supposed to find that attractive in a man? How about a guy that thinks I'm attractive because I like the way I look! It's contradictions like this that make healthy self esteem nearly impossible. It takes some work and effort to look nice, to look the way you want to look, and there is no reason to feel ashamed for that! We can't all roll out of bed looking like an Herbal Essences commercial.
So right now, take a look in your mirror, and say "Damn, gurl, you look good." And don't you even feel guilty, you are allowed to know you're beautiful! LOVE. YO. SELF.
Oh and how about a round of applause for my first ever successful jumping shot! You can send me a gift basket if you want (I like chocolate covered fruit).
Passionate rants aside, it is really important to like the way you look, and to be true to yourself. I can't tell you how much more confident and happy with myself I've been since I started this blog. I mean, I always dressed outside the norm (mismatching shoes, anyone?) but being proud of my outfits and the way I look is something that came around after I started working on them. It's something I think everyone should try!
Okay, now about this dress. When I saw it online I was like "OMG this is it, the perfect summer dress!" And I held my breath for 2 months (2 MONTHS) waiting for it to get here. When it did, I was heartbroken. It's so shiny! I had built it up to be utter perfection, and I just thought it looked like a cheap costume. It does not look shiny online. And to return it would have cost half of what I paid for it! So it hung in my closet for another month. Occasionally I would pull it out and squint at it, then put it back on it's hanger.
Since then, I've seen a ton of bloggers wearing it. Check The Clothes Horse and The Pineneedle Collective, for example. And they rocked it, shiny polyester and all. So, slowly I've come to terms with it. On some advice from Annika, I wore it with some more muted accessories, and I'm starting to love it once again!
Dress: Sheinside
shoes: Rack Room?
shirt: American Apparel
hat: thrifted
spike necklace: DIY
unicorn necklace: Forever 21
sunglasses: JC Pennys
Tell me in the comments about how beautiful you know you are!
You are so right. There is nothing wrong with liking the way you look. You should like how you look. Ugh, I always hated those girls in high school that would be like "OMG I'M FAT" or "I AM LIKE SO UGLY AND YOU ARE SO PRETTY UGHDKFJEFGBJB." That's not cute.
ReplyDeleteIt's true! Confidence is pretty!
DeleteExactly! Never let anyone make you feel bad for having love/confident for yourself! You never need a reason to dress up. I've had someone tell me that I would dress up to attract others. UH NOPE.
ReplyDeleteOh I love that dress... It really looks cute and not shiny in photos.
I've heard people say that they dress for guys, or that they dress for other girls. And I think most fashion bloggers agree with me when I say I dress for ME!
DeleteYour outfit is so sweet! Love those florals and pretty colors <3 Alex
ReplyDeletetobebeautifulingodseyes.blogspot.com
wonderful post! Totally agree. I hate how when i mention i am in the fashion industry or a fashion blogger people automatically assume I am shallow and need attention. Like uh not true just so happens that fashion is the GREATEST way to express yourself!!!!!
ReplyDeletefinally catching up on the ladies of the flock's individual blogs :) been missing READING blogs life has caught up w/ me! xo
Rach
Fashion really gets a bad rap sometimes, and it shouldn't! It's deemed "girly" by society, and that's not even fair.
DeleteThe self-love ethos is totally going around the blogosphere this month - I actually wrote a really similar piece a while ago! http://colormebrazen.wordpress.com/2013/06/05/i-never-claimed-not-to-be-a-narcissist/ I agree wholly with you, and I really like the phrase "boner for humility".
ReplyDeleteI also love your nails! And cheap costumes ain't so bad. ;)
...and I just noticed you already read that piece. :P
ReplyDeleteI've been noticing it alot, too, Skye! Your post was one of several that got me inspired!
DeleteYou look so lovely here! I love how you've styled this dress. Shopping on those types of sites is always kind of a gamble, for sure. Oddly, it doesn't look shiny in these photos here! The print is so lovely, so I'm glad you found a way you could wear it and love it (especially since it's basically futile to return items)! And this was a wonderful rant. :) I actually find myself apologizing for myself when people bring up the fact that I'm a blogger... like I'll feel a little embarrassed and say, "oh, it's just a silly thing." I've actually been surprised because a lot of people (other actors, etc.) will come back with something like, "no, it's a creative outlet for you, and if you like what you're doing, then who cares?" I just assume people will think it's really superficial. But it is something I care about and really enjoy. So who gives a flying fig, really? And honestly, a little superficiality once in a while never hurt anyone, anyway! And actually, my self-confidence has grown as a result of blogging -- not because of any compliments I receive, but because I can finally recognize my own beauty and I also find worth in the fact that I like my sense of style and feel great about outfits I come up with and excited about what I'm doing. So there. End of MY rant.
ReplyDeletexox Sammi
www.thesoubrettebrunette.blogspot.com
Sammi, I totally do the same thing. I'm like, embarrassed to be a blogger sometimes and I don't want to share it with my IRL friends. I'm really trying to be proud of it though, because if I enjoy it, then it's worthwhile dangit!
DeleteHaha that's right Marlen! I love posting my outfits for the interaction with bloggers because it turns fashion into a conversation which is really cool. But pleasing yourself first is important (in so many things) because you know someone's gonna hate!
ReplyDeleteI want to study a degree in Fashion at uni; when I tell people this I always feel that they are judging me and class me as some stupid air head, which I am not. It also makes me angry that people class degrees, such as fashion or anything else remotely arty, as 'useless', where do they think their clothes come from????
ReplyDeleteOn the other hand though I have just got into the mind set that I don't care what people think, and I can't think of doing anything else but going into fashion, as it is one thing that gets me really excited.
Sorry for this out pouring. I love your outfit as always and continue to enjoy reading your blog ;D
Don't apologize, I love reading comments like this!
DeleteI totally get you with that whole artsy degree thing. I used to apologize for my Illustration major saying it wasn't a "real major". But there's an amount of creativity and hard work that go into artsy majors that someone doing business (can you say yawn?) couldn't imagine.
You are awesome! Confidence is such a hard thing to conquer, but it shouldn't be! I definitely get in the dumps here and there but have to remember that I love who I am, I love how I dress, I love how I look. Of course there's always things people want to change on themselves. I don't know one person who doesn't think that... But then I start asking "Why?" And that's when I start realizing it really doesn't matter. I am who I am. And that makes me happy. :)
ReplyDeleteAnd btw, I LOVE that dress. Ok, the shininess would get to me too. But the muted trick worked like a charm! And your necklace? WANT. I love unicorns!!!!! <3
Such a beautiful post!
Thanks, Adrienne! As women, we all have insecurities (and I know dudes do too), but it is so important to be happy with yourself!
DeleteAMEN to everything you said. There was a really neat article/post awhile back about how fashion is really a woman's art form and it talked then about why it is seen as shallow (and how it is not). I think you'd find it interesting (I'm gonna be lazy and say the link is on my June in Review post instead of looking up the link again. Sorry.) Though, I DO think men are attracted to self confidence (ever notice how once you are going out with someone men seem to crawl out of the woodwork? Totally that self-confidence), which liking how you look can give you. Plus, whether we like it or not, first impressions are created in the first six seconds someone sees you, way before you ever even open your mouth.
ReplyDeleteAlso- this dress. I really do love it. Very pretty. Weird about the shine though. You can't tell here but it is hard to get used to an unusual material with clothing.